March Had Me in a Chokehold (et NOT in a Kinky Way)
Is the third month of the year over already?
March was cute. In the kind of way where your homegirl shows you a picture of the guy she’s considering dating out of boredom—but he’s “sooo nice though.” Niceness is performative, et March put on quite the show.
Despite winter’s barely bitter exit, my mind was everywhere, all the time, all at once. Shoutout Michelle Yeoh. I started new projects, avoided others, bought nothing (yay!!) et complained about the cold (of course). Somewhere between the shivers et IG scrolls, there were a few highlights.
So, without further ado, et because you didn’t ask—yet—here are the keys to my March madness.
Look Up in the Sky, it’s a Bird, it’s a Plane, it’s Seasonal Depression Maybe!
Something super weird happened this winter. It was like one day I just gave up, entirely. I spent a full week in bed—doing everything from work to eating dinner within the comforts of my black et white striped duvet. I was down baaaad.
It felt like I was hit by a massive wave of molasses that swallowed me in slow motion et pulled every limb deeper into a sticky sadness. I’d never felt anything like it, et I can honestly say it was a 0/10, do not recommend. Gray skies made me cry, ice made me irritable, frost had me frantic, et even the thought of holding any kind of conversation made my head spin.
Eventually, the sun came, time sprinted forward like it was late for class, et I made it out of bed. So maybe, like that TikTok sound says, I wasn’t sad—I was just frozen from the inside out. Is there such a thing as diet depression? All the symptoms, none of the medical paperwork.
TV That Felt Like Homework
Seriously, Nicole Kidman's on screen hairstylist should take notes
Before I started Severance, I considered myself a smart girl—but Dan Erickson has me out here feeling every bit of my college dropout because girrrl, what’s going on???
This is probably my own fault, considering I skipped the last three episodes of season one because I just could not commit to the confusion at that time. Read the episode synopses instead, then did the same thing for the first two episodes of season two.* This isn’t to say the show isn’t good. Adam Scott’s range, Patricia Arquette’s chilling mannerisms et lavish lace front, every coded detail about Tramell Tillman’s character, the eerie comparisons between corporate life et a common cult. It’s good tv, no question.
It’s just—I’m only still here to get to the tea about Gemma, yet after the season two finale I’m still confused. Can’t wait to see which episodes of season three I commit to though!
Creative Sparks (Some of Which I Actually Lit)
God, I hate a side hustle.
I also hate when people say they were “bOrN iN tHe WrOnG gEneRatIon,” but lately? I’m starting to believe I may have been too. Because any era where one job could cover your rent, your wine, et a coastal crash out where you're on a mission to "find yourself" (this is also known as a vacation, I hear)? That’s where I need to be.
To be clear—it’s not the side hustle itself I resent. It’s the fact that now it feels mandatory, not like some niche passion you chase for funsies. Somewhere along the way, creative play turned into a survival strategy. Et while I’m grateful my creativity has currency, sometimes I’m like... should I have just been an accountant?*
That said, I still had some moments that reminded me why I chose this life: I shot an AD-inspired editorial for a friend (which I’m also writing!), lent two hands to the So Stylé Galaxy bracelet launch et new arrivals rollout, planned a Met Gala-influenced shoot, et even cosplayed an It Girl-of-the-moment for a brand event.
Beautiful work comes with beautiful burnout~ I bet a creative person with a voice that sells has said something similar on a podcast once. For now, I’m learning to find the joy again—even if I have to invoice for it later.
March MVPs aka the Little Things that Made the Madness Worth It
After a year+ of searching, I finally found a leather jacket. Sophie et I were out thrifting (as usual) when the vintage moto jacket of my dreams–with the price tag of my wallet’s dreams–called out to me from a rack at the back of Carole Vintage. Cool, effortless, not too oversized or too long, with brown thread you just know was black once but through whatever trials et tribulations is now a reddish-orange brunette. This jacket can take a punch et she’s seen plenty. Prepared to be sick of me!
Also after years of searching, Sophie came through with the perfect accent chair to replace the one I broke over a year ago. Call my living room Ciara because she immediately leveled up!
Out of all the things in my big ol bag of ‘NEEDS ALTERATIONS,’ I managed to get one skirt taken in. Stay tuned for the pics because she’s viciousssss.
I played Monopoly for the very first time! I didn’t think there was a game that could go toe-to-toe in length with The Game of Life, but here we are. I didn’t win—but honestly, who really wins when faux capitalism is involved, hmm? Still trying to wrap my head around this being considered a children’s game.
FOOTNOTES
*Which is actually far less insane than what I did with Game of Thrones (I have only seen the first et last season)
*Probs not, I’m really bad at math
